Reviews

Review – Taito Memories

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Why hello there Taito Memories. Fancy seeing you here for ten dollars. I think I just might take you home with me. I’ve always been really curious about what you’re all about. After all, you’re not quite like your other cousins. Last generation saw tons of you classic compilations being released, on PS2 and just about everywhere else.

Namco, Capcom, Sega, Atari, even Activision and Midway tried their hand at it. Seems they sold pretty well too, though gamers also learned that they could never guess what to expect from you compilations. They might get all the classics, and they might not. They may get 20 games, or fewer than ten. There could be tons of bonus content and great emulation, or sparse features and horrible recreations of each game. The only guarantee was that if you bought something from Sega, you were going to get more than a few recycled games. →  Welcome to the Fantasy Zone.

Review – Super Star Soldier on the Virtual Console

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Originally released in 1991 for the NEC TurboGrafx-16, Super Star Soldier is an old-school shooter that really pushes your buttons.

If you kids want to see how bad we old geezer gamers had it back in the day, then you need to play Super Star Soldier. There are no save points, and forget about unlimited continues. To beat this game, you need…nope, forget it, you won’t beat this game. It’s just too hard for you.

If you’ve played any of the recently released shooters like Treasure’s Ikaruga, then you’ll probably be disappointed with SSS. It doesn’t have any unique health system or gameplay mechanic. SSS is very much by the books. The early 90’s shooter books, anyway. Basically, all bullets are bad bullets, and it only takes one to take you down. →  I’m so excited, my braces are tingling!

Review – Marvel: Ultimate Alliance (Wii)

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Marvel: Ultimate Alliance is a great game … just not for the Wii. I originally played it about a month ago on an XBox 360 and was quite impressed, and then I noticed that it was launching with the Wii. Something told me to lay off the knee-jerk purchase and use good ol’ Game Fly once again to test the waters with minimal cost. I sent the game back in four days.

The X-Men: Legends series is fantastic. Four-player (later over XBox Live) superhero, beat-em-up RPG. You just can’t go wrong. I played both versions through about three times trying to level up the thirty-some-odd unlockable characters, loving every minute of it. So when I heard that Marvel was teaming up with the same developer to make a game with over 150 playable superheroes spanning the entire Marvel universe I could barely wait. →  Let’s get read-y.

Review – Red Steel

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If you’ve paid attention to some of the reviews Red Steel has gotten, you probably have no idea what the game is really like. The scores are all over the place, and reviewers just can’t seem to agree on what is good or bad about the game. Some love the sword fighting, some don’t. Some hate the gun controls so much that they barely touch upon the rest of game. The best advice for you is to just forget about those losers and their reviews. This is the only one you need to worry about.

Let’s hit each one of the major problems first, just to cleanse you of all the garbage you may still have in your head. First, the controls are a little hard to grasp, at least initially. →  Readlevania

Review – Gears Of War

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With a game that has so much hype grabbing onto to its heels and biting violently, it’s difficult to even know where to begin with such a review. I feel I should be writing an equally monumental review to represent the game: a 3,000 page mini encyclopaedia describing every minute detail that would no doubt spoil the game when you eventually pick it up, and lead to you sending me brown stuff in paper bags through my letterbox. Seeing as though I don’t want large amounts of waste dropping on my doorstep, I’ll refrain. So, where in the hell should I start?

He’s a man’s man (but still straight).

Let’s start at the obvious place — the graphics. I doubt you need me to tell you how pretty this game is, because we’ve all seen the screenshots. →  Let’s get read-y.

Review – Rampage: Total Destruction (Wii)

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Thanks to GameFly, I’m able to get my hands on games like this for a negligible cost, taking some of the sting away. I guess I wasn’t really expecting much from this game but I was still rather disappointed. I enjoyed playing the past iterations of the series… I mean, as much as one can enjoy this type of repetitive game play, and I was looking forward to some sort of innovative control scheme with the Wiimote. Nope.

The Wii functionality was obviously an afterthought, as you can only execute two movements with the motion sensing (a ground smash and a swipe attack). Movement in general was pretty sluggish, and there were times when I could barely get my monster to do anything let alone pull off the unlockable fancy combo moves. →  How many games must a gamer play before you call him a gamer?

Review – Guitar Hero 2

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You know the feeling of excitement you got as a child trying to sleep on Christmas Eve? That’s the feeling I got waiting for Guitar Hero 2. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t anticipating this game as much as the new Zelda. I don’t think I’m alone, either. With Guitar Hero 1 selling a million copies since its release, there are plenty of wannabe rockers out there who are ready to rip it up all over again. Now the wait is over. No longer do we have to settle for Youtube videos of schmucks who got access to the ten song industry demo laying it down for us. Guitar Hero 2 is here. Are you ready?

You damn well better be, because this sequel waits for no one. The word of the day here is “challenge,” as Guitar Hero 2 challenges both its players and the competition. →  PaReader the Reader

Review – Goonzu

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Goonzu – B

Genre: MMORPG

Quickie:
If you’re bored and want to try something new and inventive, try Goonzu. Its blend of economic and political aspects only add to its addicting nature and in-depth gameplay. Did I mention it was free?

Full Review:

Is that an evil onion?

At first glance, Goozu seems like just another Korean clone of Ragnarok Online, but a closer look might change your mind. Like any other MMORPG, gameplay centers around creating a character and improving your stats through hours of play during sleepless nights. Combat is a part of the game, and so is the process of completing quests in order to advance to the next level of experience. What sets Goonzu apart from other games in the genre is the fact that it focuses on the mechanics of economics and an active political system. →  Jesus: Readful Bio Monster

Review – King of Fighters 2006

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Beat King of Fighters 2006 on story mode, and you will see the name Falcoon pop up several times, in many important positions. If you are at all familiar with SNK, you might have heard it pop up in discussions from time to time. Is he a gaming auteur, like Kojima or Miyamoto? Is it SNK’s bold new leader?

Not quite. The truth is that the man is just a fan artist that was hired by SNK a few years back, and was somehow given the reigns to the KOF: Maximum Impact series, arguably the most important thing they have going for them right now. KOF 2006 (which is really Maximum Impact 2 with a new name) actually answers the question of “if you put a fan in charge of their favorite game, what will you get?” →  Read like G did.

Review – Sid Meier’s Railroads

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It could have been legendary… instead it’s just good. That’s how I’d sum up Sid Meier’s Railroads. It’s not that the core game isn’t fun: in fact, I’d say that for the most part, the core game is what shines. Unfortunately, the game was rushed out, and it shows: the first version is buggy, a little light on content, and lacks several key gameplay features that would make things much easier. Despite all of this, the game is quite fun, and I am confident that within 2-3 patches it will be where it needs to be. And it was only $40, instead of $50, so I guess that’s why we got 80% of a game.

What I Love

The core game engine of Sid Meier’s Railroads is excellent. Cities are placed throughout the map, with their starting supply/demand determined randomly. →  Go ahead, read my day.

Review – Disgaea

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As I’ve grown older I have become more acutely aware that compromises are ubiquitous in game design. I once raised common questions like, “Why don’t they make this game longer,” “Why isn’t this game more open ended,” and “Why isn’t there more dialog in this game?”

A longer game time may dilute the story and make gameplay tedious. An open ended game is less focused and loses narrative potency, and more dialog can slow down fast paced gameplay. I now realize that for every obvious improvement, there is at least a small case to be made for keeping a design choice unchanged.

If you look closely, you’ll notice some soldiers measuring their height relative to their enemies and others looking through their item packs for healing herbs.

When I was younger I longed for complexity in games. →  While there is a lower class, I am in it, while there is a criminal element, I am of it, and while there is a soul in prison, I am not gaming.

Review – Harvest Moon DS

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Seriously, did you ever think a farming simulator would be a fun game to play? Of course it would be, how silly of me. Finally appearing on the DS, Harvest Moon DS brings the enjoyable horticulturalist gameplay to the dual-screened handheld, but not without its fair share of problems.

In Harvest Moon, you play as a young man in charge of his family’s farm. In all previous HM games, there has not been any back-story, so don’t be surprised that you don’t find one here, either. Just know it’s up to you to restore your family’s farm to its once graceful status.

Cat…hand stroking it…nope, I can’t think of anything clever to say about this picture.

The only thing that could be remotely called a storyline in HM is the argument between the Harvest Goddess and the Witch. →  Tony Hawk’s Posting Ground

Review – Doom 3

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I didn’t understand all of the hype surrounding the release of Doom 3. So the graphics were cutting edge (assuming you wanted to drop $500 to get your memory and graphics card up to snuff), it was still a game based on a series well-known for having repetitious play and no story line whatsoever. Now don’t get me wrong, I loved playing the first Doom games/expansions, but I had a feeling they wouldn’t hold up if played them years later. I found my fears were correct as I tried to play both 1 and 2 off of the “Special Edition” Xbox game that comes with the entire set on one disc. Fun for the nostalgia, not so much for the gameplay. I made it about fifteen minutes in before moving on to the new game. →  Destroy All Articles! 2

Review – Sam & Max Episode 1: Culture Shock

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Well here it is folks. After much trial and delay, the world can finally partake in a new Sam & Max game. Since my only experience with these two characters comes from a handful of viewings of the old Fox Kids cartoon show, my interest in seeing new Sam & Max was quite neutral. Yet my desire to play the new game has been quite high, for no other reason than my great interest in the way in which it was developed. This has to be one of the biggest gambles the industry has seen this generation, one that I hope to see succeed.

After Lucasarts decided to waffle around and eventually can their efforts on a new game, creator Steven Purcell looked towards small developer Telltale Games to start anew. →  Professor Layton and the Diabolical Post

Review – Grand Theft Auto: Liberty City Stories

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For this review, I’m afraid I am going to resort to the greatest cop out in games journalism; you are either going to like Liberty City Stories, or you’re not. To some, it is a downgrade from the huge, deep world that was created for San Andreas, a graphically lesser romp through a city we’ve all seen before. Rockstar is just trying to milk their fanbase of even more money, and should be ashamed of themselves. To myself and others, LCS is a technical marvel, (being developed for the PSP), a full fledged GTA experience that combines GTA3’s world with Vice City’s upgrades, all for the cost of a budget game. In this light, Rockstar has given us a nice little gift.

And that’s really it from a review standpoint. Anyone familiar with the series will find no surprises here, save perhaps for seeing Tony Cipriani as a thin gunman rather than a fat restaurant owner. →  Readius III and IV

Review – Golden Sun

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For the most part, the library of video games consists largely of clones of previously successful games. Games such as Grand Theft Auto III have spawned so many sorry attempts at duplication that a whole new sub-genre was born. There was a time when there was only Grand Theft Auto, and the imitators were yet to join the party. So revolutionary titles do happen. They do not happen frequently, and there are plenty of examples of games that tried to establish something new and failed. I think ChoroQ is an example of this. In trying to create an RPG complete with plot, towns, and dungeon exploration within the context of a racing game (or vice versa) the series (which apparently has several iterations on various systems around the world) tried something unique but ended up making a below average game. →  This better not be as bad as everything else here.

Review – Mount&Blade

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Sometimes games that are incredibly good have no advertising whatsoever. These games are usually made popular by word-of-mouth, if anything (Katamari Damacy for example). Developed by a husband-and-wife team, Mount & Blade is one such game.

I am often distracted while defending my castle by the natural beauty of the setting sun.

I first heard about Mount & Blade half a year ago on a forum. I didn’t try it out at the time, mostly because the authors of the posts were comparing it to Morrowind (which I found incredibly boring). A few months ago, though, I saw it again at a gaming site, this time with a formal, in-depth review that made it sound more interesting. I decided to give it a try and downloaded it.

Mount & Blade isn’t freeware, but it is open-ended shareware. →  Ultima IV: Quest of the Avatarticle

Review – Ico

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Barely noticed when it was first released, Ico has now become the #1 game to reference when bringing up the issue of art in games. But is it really all that and a bag of potato chips?

Developed by SCEI (Parappa the Rapper, Shadow of the Colossus) and directed by Fumito Ueda, Ico is a third-person adventure game, set in a derelict castle that is situated on top of an island just a few hundred yards off the coast of some unknown continent. Cut-off by ocean on each of its sides, the castle becomes the player’s prison, so to speak.

Ico is a young boy (his name is never referenced, so I’m only guessing it’s his name) that has been shunned by his village and sent to an empty castle to distance himself from society. →  Zero Escape: Nine Hours, Nine Authors, Nine Articles

Review – Prince of Persia: Warrior Within

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I’m sure everyone remembers the shitstorm that hit the Internet when Prince of Persia: Warrior Within was released two years ago. An unstoppable tide of criticism and disgust toward the game flowed for months, only getting worse when it ended up outselling The Sands of Time by leagues. (Thankfully, we were spared from having the Prince’s early game cry of “You Bitch!” become the next Internet trend.) However, the most curious thing about the criticism was that very few people ever made any sort of commentary on the actual gameplay. For all intents and purposes, it looked like angry nerds acting as immature and angsty as the kids that Warrior Within was trying to cater to (though that is not to say that I didn’t jump on the bandwagon for some period of time). →  Four out of five dentists recommend reading more.

Review – Half-Life 2: Episode One

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Right now in the world of console gaming, everyone’s favorite buzz term is “HD era”. In PC gaming, it’s all about “episodic content.” Everyone is talking about the concept of delivering smaller chunks of gaming more quickly and possibly with customized content based on user reactions. Unfortunately, the talk is mostly hot air. For one, very few developers have released anything episodic for us to judge, and those that are out there are either a little too indy (Bone) or not quite up to snuff (Sin). Fortunately, the biggest supporters of the idea, Valve Software, have finally given us Half Life 2: Episode 1, the first of many sequel stories to their smash hit. Maybe now we can finally see what this episodic content stuff is all about.

I can think of at least one issue with episodic content; even when we have something to review, how do we review it? →  Welcome to the Fantasy Zone.