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Best Game Ever – Streets of Rage 2

posted on April 13th, 2006 by billy

Developer: Sega
Publisher: Sega for the Genesis
Released: 1993

Stomp

Mr. X is significantly shorter when you fight him at the end of the game.

If I had a choice between playing a new Xbox360 game and playing an all time classic like Streets of Rage 2, I would of course pick the Xbox360, naturally. When I got bored with that though, I would bust out my emulator, sync up with my brother Rick and play the hell out of some SoR2.

Streets of Rage 2 was by far the best and greatest, nay the pinnacle of the brawler “beat em up” style game. Double Dragon, the Ninja Turtles games, Bad Dudes, Ikari Warriors? All the pond scum on the bottom of SoR2’s boots.

If you don’t believe me, then it’s clear that you haven’t played this game. Yes it’s that good, so good that if you disagree, then your opinion is literally wrong. Dealing with that kind of extremity is what playing this game is all about. Why only yesterday I was a mere lad and I stole this title from my friend Chris, I somehow convinced him that he “lost it.” *snortle* Used to hook that bad boy up and play with my brother Rick all through the night.

Now this is the best and most important part of the game. This is what makes the game most worthwhile, and why it’s a testament to the Jappo perversion. Choose the character Blaze, the hot brunet with the great gravity defying rack. Make her do her cartwheel kick and pause just as her legs are at a 90 degree angle. UNDERWEAR!!!! Purty pink panties! Old Mary Jane Rotten-crotch! Nice. Is what you would say if you were like 13, which I was at the time.

Upskirt

Now you have no reason to actually play the game.

Provided you were able to make it past the 1st level and all the panty peekabooing, you were in for a beautiful 2D rendered world of punks, hookers, fat guys with chains, motorcycles from Thunderdome and Mr. X. The game progresses from left to right standard 2D side scrolling action, with the occasional diagonal right-down and an elevator scene or two. The colors are gorgeous and the characters look really defined for a 16 bit game.

Story-wise you’re out you rescue Adam, the black dude form SoR1. He’s been kidnapped by that rascal Mr. X. Anyway you got a couple friends to come, including Adams kid brother Skate, and a gigantic wrestler named Max. You go from scene to scene kicking ass and chewing bubble gum, even though you’re ALL OUT OF BUBBLEGUM BABY! This game packs so much punch that in order to keep up with demand for ass kickery, Sega had to import cheap colons from Mexico.

If they made a video game version for that song Old Time Rock N Roll then it would be this game. If you are a 16 bit Sega aficionado this is a title that belongs in your collection.

11 Comments

  1. Billy said on April 13, 2006:

    Its not a dead genre, its just in a coma.

  2. Tony said on April 13, 2006:

    This is still one of my favorite games of all time. Ironic that it’s third version is one of my least favorite games of all time.

  3. Dan said on April 13, 2006:

    Max was always my favorite character. Sure, he was slow. Sure that slide kick thing was pretty useless. But man, the way he beat the living shit out of guys…brings a tear to my eyes.

  4. Tony said on April 13, 2006:

    I liked playing with Skate … but mostly because the other players made the game too easy. Especially Axl with his “Ran Uppa-caa!!”

  5. Billy said on April 13, 2006:

    Hey! I liked Axel, only because I dont like being a feminist or a minority though 😀

  6. jay said on April 14, 2006:

    I doubt a feminist would fight in a short red skirt.

  7. Billy said on April 14, 2006:

    Oh Oh I see, so a woman HAS to fight in something YOU a MALE thinks she should fight in? She couldnt POSSIBLY fight in something trashy and appealing?! FACIST!

  8. jay said on April 14, 2006:

    Damn, I got served.

  9. matt said on July 17, 2006:

    the most memorable things about this game for me was how the wrestlin’ dude would catch bad guys & clap their heads ’till they died and the ninja badguys who said weird faux Japanese things as they teleported. hey, was this the samr game with the HUGE fat dudes who laughed & puffed fire?

  10. jay said on July 17, 2006:

    Yeah, those bastards are in this game. I think very similar enemies were in Final Fight, too, since Sega borrowed liberally from the Capcom game.

  11. Breno Fonseca Soares said on September 11, 2010:

    SoR2 was the supreme point in the series. SoR1 was quite difficult, and I only finished it with a level select cheat. With SoR2, I could reach the seventh stage without the Very Easy difficulty mode (but I use them, anyway). As for SoR3 (whose Japanese version I downloaded recently), I don’t think the game is that bad, but some things in this game are quite different. The low point in this game was the removal of Skate’s classic Crocscrew Kick (Foward+A). As for the high points, those fat men don’t have that irritating fire-spitting attack! And most important of all… YOU CAN PLAY WITH SHIVA! I went from the second to eighth stages playing with him, and I barely needed to use his Final Clash attack!

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