We didn’t go to the Tokyo Games Show

Despite a great deal of pleading, Jay would not finance a single trip to TGS this year. This is because Jay is a big fat racist. So because we didn’t go we can’t present you with what we saw there. However, because we’ve got nothing else to do besides F5ing the internet we felt like we did go*. We felt like we were there and so here’s the high quality games journalism coverage you would have got, had we been there. Don’t say we don’t give you anything for free vl reader. There’s no point vocalising what we all know.

Videolamers TGS Coverage Issue:

Check out the 4500 photos that Christian took whilst dicking around in Japan. Japanese buildings, Japanese people in the street, signs in Japan in English, Japanese HMVs etc. etc.

Check out the 1200 photos that Jay took of Japanese people doing Cosplay including 978 photos of various Chun-Lis, 100 photos of the S.T.A.R.S team and over one hundred photos of characters from games that never made it out of Japan but in which, Camel Toe or side boob is visible.

Check out Golden Jew’s second grade anthropology project all about Japan. Did you know that Japan is different to America? Did you know that the Japanese do things differently? They do! Who would have thought? They all speak funny too which is why we all spent most of the time dicking around rather than covering anything.

Check out my exclusive photos of game related toys in Japanese shops. Over 14,000 images of franchises nobody knows or cares about, however, lots of them have huge titties.

Discover the real TGS with Pat’s booth girl coverage. Do Asian girls looking slightly uncomfortable get you off? Want photos of feet, buns and hands? Then click nowhere else friend, it’s all here for you.

Follow Chris as he tries to make sense of it all without making any effort to communicate with anyone else in anything other than English. He literally doesn’t have a fucking clue but he’s a true professional journalist though.

Get the low down on the queues at TGS with Alexis. Some queues were really really big. Click here for the big queue photos.

Girls. See girls. Real Girls. And tits.

There were some games there, too.

* We checked Kotaku.